How to be the greatest mom EVER!

 Honestly, being the MOST PERFECT mom to ever walk the earth is completely irrational so DON'T EVEN TRY lol. However, being the GREATEST mom that YOU can be........... now that is attainable! 

I think that sometimes we can mix up the words GREAT and PERFECT. 

By definition, to do something  GREAT means to do it well and skillfully. 

To do something PERFECTLY means to do it "flawlessly". And since there is no blueprint or handbook to parenting, Ide say that us trying to do it PERFECTLY is completely out of the question! 

But for some reason we seem to always put this enormous amount of pressure on ourselves to try and be this perfect mom when we know that PERFECTION does not exist. We never give ourselves the credit we deserve, we are always beating ourselves up and we continue to hold ourselves to a ridiculously high standard. We are literally our own worst enemy, continually blocking ourselves from being the greatest mom, woman or simply........HUMAN that God has created us to be! Why is that?

I have a few theories about why we block ourselves from being the GREATEST mom's ever. 

1. I think that we allow society to give us the blueprint for successful parenting! 

(Lets all NOT do that anymore 😢)

2. We then ADOPT that blueprint which is unattainable. So then, when we can't attain it we feel like crap about ourselves.

3. We simply don't feel like we DESERVE to call ourselves GREAT MOMS! 

(I have felt like this MANY times in the past!)

4. We feel like we can't do this by ourselves.  (Most of us didn't ask for this. Someone else's decisions or circumstances out of our control brought us to this point in life.)

IM 100% SURE I MISSED SOME THEORIES HERE!

While I know that these "theories" can hold us back, lets talk about a few things that we can do to COMBAT these negative thoughts that we have towards ourselves and our situations?

How can we combat societies ideologies about what we should or shouldn't be doing as mothers?

Lets talk practically about strategies and things we can do to believe and understand and proclaim our GREATNESS as mother..........as women PERIOD!

STEPS TO STAND IN YOUR GREATNESS AS A MOM!

1. DAILY AFFIRMATIONS - It's so simple. Say what you are, say what you desire, say what you want to see. 

There is a scripture in the Bible that speak so powerfully about the words that we CHOOSE to speak. 

Proverbs 18:21 in the Message Version says this: "Words kill, words give life; they're either poison or  fruit- you choose."..................that is so powerful.

Now repeat after me..........I am great mom. I am doing an AMAZING job. I am strong. I raise my children WELL............or you can come up with your own affirmations that fit your situation. Just make sure that its positive and you say it EVERYDAY.

2. GIVE YOURSELF GRACE: My good friend Ari came over one day to hang out and she was saying how she had missed talking to me. I apologized to her and started to go into this long drawn out explanation about how I tend to completely shut myself off from the world when things get challenging. She interrupted me mid sentence and said!.......... "Theres Grace for that". It took me aback. 

So I said "huh?'

She said " I said there is grace for that. You don't owe me an apology, Its tough out here right now. We are all out here trying to figure it out. Theres no need for an explanation because...............THERE'S GRACE FOR THAT"

And that my fellow mommas is what I want you to know. 

There is grace available for every mistake, every bad day you have with the kids, every time you yelled when you shouldn't have..........THERE'S GRACE FOR THAT! 

The grace is there but whether or not you give it to yourself is going to be determined by you. 

But its there sis! 

3. UNDERSTAND EACH CHILD AND PARENT THEM ACCORDINGLY: 

I have three daughters as you can see in the family photo at the top. When I tell you these kiddos couldn't be anymore different from each other. 

My oldest daughter is 20 and she is very outgoing and head strong, she is a people person and is in her sophomore year of College. She bumps her head a few times before she learns a lesson (like so many of us at 20 right? Lol. but she has a love for family and friends that causes her to be loyal and I love that about her.  

My middle daughter is 9 and she is responsible, level headed, kind, sweet and funny. She's never in any trouble and wouldn't hurt a fly. I mean NEVER in any trouble and is GREAT with money at 9..............incredible.

My baby girl just turned 6, she has additional needs and she is LOUD. But she is also charismatic and a little snuggle bug, she is the most creative of the three and I would like to think she inherited that from me lol. But these kids have so many different needs and I have had to learn how to care for them each in a way that is true to them. 

I didn't always know how to do that. I wish I had of understood this more when my oldest was younger but you know what...........THERE'S GRACE FOR THAT! (See what I did there?) 😉

I even correct them differently they don't all operate the same. This takes time to learn and sometimes as you Childs personality changes as they get older your method for parenting will too, which leads me to my last point!

4. FIND A COMMUNITY: One of the things that I have found so helpful in the midst of EVERYTHING that we are facing as a society is COMMUNITY. Now I'll be honest, as an introvert I usually keep to myself but there is something about this pandemic that really had me longing to be with other. I wanted to be safe so the first thing I did was went and joined a online community of other single moms. This is so important because a lot of times we feel like we are in this thing alone. Let me tell you sis...............YOU ARE NOT ALONE and you never will be. There are so many other single mothers out there who are going through some of the same issues as you! They are fighting some of the same battles as you. They are celebrating some of the same triumphs as you. Get connected.

Click the links below to join the SINGLE PARENT SUMMIT communities that I have started for mother's just like you. 

*CLICK THE LINKS BELOW TO CONNECT WITH OTHER SINGLE MOMS ON FACEBOOK AND INSTAGRAM***

SINGLE MOM FACEBOOK GROUP: https://www.facebook.com/groups/620423618709879

SINGLE MOM INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/singleparentsummit/

At the end of the day, a great mom is a happy mom.  

A great mom is a confident mom. A great mom is a loving mom. 

And this is what your children need from you. It's what mine need from me. 

Your doing a GREAT job mom! 

Keep up the GREAT work!

In the comment section below, name one thing that makes a you a great mom! 

I'll go first!

 What makes me a great mom is that I am teaching my children how to be creative, responsible and independent people that are kind to ALL PEOPLE!